More about my journey, and "the male response"

First and foremost I must sing the praises of unrefined shea butter. My hair officially loves it and it leaves my curls luciously moisturized and touchably soft. I had a hard time keeping my hands out of my hair the other day just because my roots felt oh so good! Now, the photo below probably doesn't look much different than my previous photo because the style is exactly the same. Believe me when I tell you, though, that my hair was much much happier in today's photo (which was actually taken yesterday).

Most of my friends really, really liked this photo. Granted this was the first photo most of my friends got to see of my "new look," but their delight is the perfect segway into the meat and potatoes of this post.

I have gotten a lot of compliments since I started transitioning. I have a friend who did not support my decision to perm after the first time I went natural, so she has been my personal "keep the curls going" cheerleader in this thing. I didn't expect a huge response at all, though. I did expect a few questions.

The more steps I take along my journey -- and believe me ordering unrefined shea butter and applying it to my hair instead of the grease and hair lotion we've all grown up knowing/loving/fearing was quite a huge step -- I become more aware of why I'm doing this and what I hope to accomplish. Thus far, the change has been a big boost to my confidence. I feel a certain level of contentment with the fact that I've managed to care for and style my hair. I looked in the mirror after taking out the rollers and twists and thought "Go on 'head, girl!" I plan to keep the momentum going.

Yesterday a male friend asked me if I would get rid of my curls if he asked me to. It was hard not to laugh. This particular friend has a photo album chock full of pictures of pretty much every girlfriend he's ever had in his adult life. They all look the same. Permed/pressed straight hair worn down with a part in the middle. *yawn*

Part of the reason I'm embarking upon this journey is to break out of that cookie-cutter, "this is pretty" model. This is about looking society square in the eye and informing them how I define beautiful for me. That requires that along the way I examine who I am and what is beautiful about me. I've got a great mind. My hair is just a small part of me, but I'm at a place where I absolutely believe it is a beautiful part of me. I wouldn't get rid of my curls for anybody, and anybody who knows me well would know not to even request such a thing. See how militant I am 20 days into this thing? Don't get me started.

Other guys have told me the curls are beautiful, and for some reason they always want to touch. Yes, this is my hair. No, there are no tracks. Most importantly, I don't want your hands in it because I don't necessarily know where you've been.

Another part of my journey does have to do with being healthy. I've been a Trader Joe's junkie for quite some time now. I prefer fruits and vegetables to fries and shakes (most of the time). It occurred to me, though, that while I was putting great things into my body, I was slapping only God knows what on top of my head. The irony in that is that even with a perm and a press, I was most likely not going to do anything spectacular with my hair other than throw it into a ponytail or a bun and go on about my day. Not for nothin', because I can cornrow, braid, twist, bump, curl and style like nobody's business-- straight hair just didn't inspire me quite like my own texture has lately. I've been thinking up new creations on the daily, and I'm dying to try them. I'm trying to save my good stuff for winter when I'll have to rely heavily upon protective styles though.

Wow, that was a tangent.

And we're back. I'm digging the whole "good stuff in, good stuff out" vibe that flows right along with this natural hair journey. I'm rolling with it and letting it wash over me. I'm looking forward to natural ingredients in my hair and skin care routines in the future.